I Sleep With My Ex's Hoodie Still
We broke up four years ago. I am engaged now. The hoodie is frayed and smells less like him every month and I cannot throw it away.
We're engaged. Planning a wedding. My fiancé is kind and steady and knows about the hoodie.
He says keep it if it helps me sleep.
That kindness makes it worse.
I wear the hoodie on nights anxiety wins. I smell fabric, not him anymore, but memory does not need accuracy.
I don't want my ex back. I want the version of me that felt chosen without compromise.
The hoodie is a time machine I deserve to retire.
I haven't yet.
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